It really has been a long while since I have been here. I have published several posts in my head — at night when I couldn’t sleep, or as I sat alone having my own little pity party, and just didn’t have the energy to do anything much less dump all my shit here so I could move on with life.
2014 was an uglyish type of year. I spent 3 weeks with my Sister and Brother-in-law taking care of my Sister as She died from brain cancer. The anniversary is coming up on the 26th. She was only 49 and loved by hundreds. The bright spot (there has to be one) is that she was in no pain. She no longer recognized us, but did as we asked with out question. Then one day she went to sleep and died two days later. Seven months later I went to my Nieces home (Sister’s daughter) and did the same thing all over again only this time it was breast cancer that had metasticized to her brain and paralyzing her throat muscles. Drs. Installed a feeding tube for meds, and for 5 weeks she struggled and fought the process. Not peaceful at all. In fact, it was very difficult to watch. We were happy to see her finally let go. She was 32 and left behind an 8 year old Son. Yes, he watched all the same shit the rest of us did.
There were pleasant moments in 2014, I am sure of it, but they were over shadowed.
2015 has the promise of adventure as we look at a possible move to some place else. Not sure where yet, but if we go it will be 1 of 2 places. Hubby’s current work environment is less than enjoyable. The “higher ups” want him to stay, but their proposed option have great potential to make things worse, so time will tell what our future holds on that front.
My youngest child will graduate high school this spring! We are really proud. College choices will depend on Hubby’s choices. My oldest child has been in college since 2008. She has enough credits to graduate with 2 BS Degrees, and is in the middle of a third when she realized: she doesn’t know what she wants to do! God help us all.
I have no resolutions. My only goal is to successfully ride the waves before me as they get to me and keep an even keel. If I learned nothing else from 2014 it’s that life is way to short to get my nighty in a knot over things of which I have no control. My Sister’s favorite saying, “Just tuck and roll.” Amen to that, Sis!